Things could be worse


The feeling comes but one time per year. The feeling when the days become warmer and the grass begins to grow. The trees start to bloom and all the signs are there. Spring has sprung. Winter is finally in our rearview mirror. The warmer weather associated with spring and summer brings with them new beginnings, a new perspective with a fresh start vibe. Warmer weather is a time of year to relax a bit, a time to stop and smell the newly bloomed roses. But while many will stand closed eyed staring at the sun, dreaming of the outdoors and what good is to come, another group will be also standing by, worrying, stressing, waiting on their impending dooms. For those who have problems with pollen, take a deep breath. That’s right, you can’t. Tis the season of red, itchy, dry eyes, headaches, clogged ears, and an endlessly runny nose. These days it seems each pollen season is predicted to be ”worst than the last” as well. A few months of eye drops, nose spray, and pills should do the trick. Ahh yes, for some, spring is wonderful. The winter’s thaw also brings an awakening of all types of creeps and creatures for worriers to fret over. One of the most vile, awful, disgusting example of the aforementioned creeps are ticks. The blood sucking, disease carrying parasites who lye and wait, ready to pounce on to their unsuspecting hosts. Ticks are the squatters of the insect world, staying where they do not belong, feasting and living off of their hosts. Each summer night, while my children ready themselves for bed, brushing their teeth, changing their clothes, and reading their books, they know how each night will end. With a full body tick check! That’s right, no one rides for free. It’s a bright, sunny Saturday morning in June. Perfect for one thing, load up the trailer and take that shit to the dump! Suddenly, clouds roll in. Honking horns, cars backing in all directions, the dumpers and their blank, me first, zombie-like stares, help the dump to give off it’s post-apocolytic feel. Something about throwing away unwanted stuff for free, it changes a person. A friendly tip, try showing up about a half hour before closing time. Hardly a zombie in sight. Yes, it’s true, these are some of the less redeeming qualities the warmer seasons have to offer us. But if you ask me, I would rather wait in line at the dump, with my tick infested branches, and my pollen filled eyes any day of the week. It sure beats the alternatives, but we can discuss those in the Winter issue of Vamé.

Illustration: Pia Dunér